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You won’t know everything, but you should be able to determine whether this relationship is going toward marriage.If he hasn’t initiated the conversation in a year, feel free to bring it up. If he gets angry or shuts down, it’s probably a sign that his commitment issues have gotten the best of him, and the relationship is not going in the right direction.The "commitment" doesn't need to be the big stuff, like marriage.We commitment-phones are even afraid of the little stuff. I was sharing a very delicate part of my life with my then-girlfriend. In my family, being happily married is like walking on water; they’re all drowning! I don’t have the magic answer, but in my own experience, a woman who can answer yes to the following questions is the best equipped to build a lasting relationship with a recovering commitment-phobe (and can spot when it’s time to run). His ability to make you laugh and see the best in others? Remind yourself about the things that drew you to him—the things that still make him who he is. But ultimatums and threats are not the solution here. You may want to be married after a few years of dating.
Here are the signs that your partner is commitment phobic.
At my worst, I’m searching for a way out—picking apart my relationship for its flaws and the reasons it won’t work in order to prevent inevitability. I’ve tried to loosen the grip this fear has on me, but I know I need someone who understands that a relationship with me will be work. Search your heart, talk to family, and seek the wisdom of friends whose opinions you respect and trust.
You see, we had been fighting—as couples do—and I didn’t want to tell her the truth. So long ago, I made the choice to keep my feet firmly planted on dry land. But my family dynamic makes it difficult for me to commit. It’s not because I’m trying to be difficult, I’m just afraid. You chose to begin a relationship with this person for a reason. What is it about the man you’re in love with or beginning to fall for? A year is ample time for someone to “know.” If he claims to have no idea, you at least should.
Her short stories and articles have appeared in "Grandma's Choice," "Treasure Box" and "Simple Joy." She has worked with children with ADHD, sensory issues and behavioral problems, as well as adults with chronic mental illness.
Kleinschmidt holds a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Montclair State University.